Reflections of a 21 Year Old

“And I will bring the blind by a way that they knew not; I will lead them in paths that they have not known. I will make darkness into light before them and make uneven places into a plain. These things I have determined to do [for them]; and I will not leave them forsaken.” Isaiah 42:16

As a kid, I always wondered what I would feel like on my birthday, if I would feel older, know more, and what I would sound like when I told people my new age, and will I forget and have to correct myself. And no matter how old I get, and how silly I realize this to be, I still wonder the same things.

This morning I woke up the grand age of 21, and I didn’t feel any different than I did yesterday. But as I ponder the last year of my life, I can’t help but be amazed at what God has carried me through, the lessons He taught me, and all the new things that happened to me when I was 20, and really how different I feel from my last birthday.

A few memories from being 20:

• Sacrificing my “Isaac” (music)—one of the hardest tasks God had required of me, but through it found and felt God’s faithfulness. Heb. 11:4
• Attending Advanced EXCEL—jumping out on a limb, trusting completely in an undefined vision, diving into the unknown, often questioning my decision, but always ashamed of my doubt when God showed Himself strong.
• Heart-to-heart talk with Jen and Sarah about waiting, cut strings, and life purpose.
• Sharing with Sarah and Jen that my dream was to work with AE.
• Driving from Minneapolis to Holland, MI for Gina’s wedding and to visit a dear friend, visiting Dave in Chicago on the way and getting lost in downtown Chicago during rush hour.
• Driving with Grace and Eileen in Holland, MI and getting lost, numerous times.
• Quitting my job at the Tea Room, and wondering how God would meet my needs, finding that God could, and did, provide for me.
• Experiencing the energy that comes from kindred spirits, and learning what it means to really miss a dear friend.
• Running the Garry Bjorklund half marathon with Mom, Joel, and Mark.
• Buying my first pair of flip-flops.
• Getting my laptop, Kermit, and sharing a love-hate relationship with said laptop.
• Getting a new brother, Peter Baehr
• Watching said new brother go on his first ride at Valley Fair, screaming my lungs out on my first big roller coaster.
• Being asked to come back and help teach Advanced EXCEL in ’08, and finding out that Grace G. was asked too.
• Journey to the Heart, what I term My Retreat With God.
• Long talks with Grace G. about food, Pilates, traveling, turning 21, and life in general.
• Camping with my family at Mable Lake, enduring the extreme heat and humidity together, scaring Mom and Dad in the dark, swimming, talking around the campfire about random things.
• Team leader for EXCEL 29, crash course in counseling, leadership, and discipleship; creating lasting friendships and memories.
• Starting to wear high heels more, A LOT.
• Late nights spent with awesome brothers and sister, watching movies, going to coffee shops, going to airports in jammies, and rolling in the snow. You guys are the BEST!
• Driving 1000 miles down to Dallas to begin a new and exciting year, stopping on the way to spend the night with dear friend Michelle and her random family.
• Experiencing as never before the goodness and sovereignty of God, and really knowing that He does have awesome plans for me.
• Reading Romans 5:20a: “But where sin increased and abounded, grace (God’s unmerited favor) has surpassed it and increased the more and superabounded.”
• Elisabeth reminding me that God sometimes gives us something good so that we will have something worthy to offer Him, and that my “Isaac” was in good hands.
• Asking and receiving, seeking and finding, knocking and finding the door open. Longing, and being told to wait, desiring and being reminded that though desire often comes from above, it is not always so that it can be fulfilled now.

As Master On High Mountain once said, “this is the first day of the rest of your life.” Yeah 21, here I come!