Normal is Not a Constant

Let's face it, it just isn't. I almost laugh when I read this post that I wrote almost exactly a year ago before I left for Germany. As I experienced then, and still do today (maybe even stronger than before), normal is an ever changing phenomenon, a constantly shifting and moving reality. As aware as I was of the unpredictability of life, I never could have guessed what awaited me in Germany, nor the series of exciting events that would take place in the months following my return. It's been a wild ride, full of surprises both delightful and scary, and I wouldn't trade the last year of my life for anything.

What was normal to me even three short months ago has changed drastically. Okay, yes, I did just get married and moved to another country, so the intense adjusting I'm experiencing is to be expected and was, for the most part, anticipated. Not many people go through so much change in so short an amount of time, and perhaps I never will again (but who knows?).

Inevitably, I'm going through a great amount of transition. Mind, body, spirit. The intensity of transition has threatened to break me a few times, and there have been those 'I'm not sure how I'm going to do this' moments. The one constant in my life, health problems, adds unwanted complication and frustration. I'm far away from most people and things and places that are familiar to me, and this time the move away from what was once home is for good, not a six month jaunt in Europe after which I will arrive safely back in Minnesota and resume a quiet and unassuming life. I often wonder when this 'new normal' will actually feel normal, when Vancouver will feel like home, when I will finally get the hang of this allergy diet I'm on (I just want to be able to eat garlic again...is that asking too much?). Becoming familiar with public transit, finding affordable groceries, just trying to get a simple prescription written by a Canadian doctor (a long story worth of it's own post), spending so much energy figuring out the basics and having hardly any left to enjoy the new place in which we live. And then there is finding a church, starting classes at Regent, processing and trying to articulate what it is that God is saying to us and re-thinking everything that He has taught me in the context of being married, and being the wife of a man pursuing graduate studies in theology.

It's a lot to process.

It is, and all those things are legitimate frustrations and adjustments, but as I heard someone say once, the lesser truth must always give way to the greater truth. The lesser truth I listed above. The greater truth is that through it all, I have never, not once, doubted that I am exactly where God wants me. That I have married the man of my dreams. That He will compensate for the sacrifices that He asked me to make in leaving my home of 23 years and the family and friends that are still there. Also, while there have been inordinate amounts of adjustments, anticipated and unanticipated, there have been adjustments and transitions that happened as naturally as breathing. Marriage, for example. Being married to Jacques has, from day one, felt like the most natural thing ever. Living together, shopping together, traveling 4,000 miles by car together, setting up a home, talking about anything and everything, eating, going to class. The only reason I can put to this phenomenon is that we were simply following in the path that God had made incredibly clear to us.

When God is leading, the following feels natural.

And now I'm not following alone, but with my best friend, husband, and fellow lover of Jesus. I'm not going through these transitions alone. I'm not facing unknowns by myself. And I know beyond the shadow of a doubt that I would much rather experience this intense time of change with Jacques than stay in what was comfortable and familiar. We are learning to embrace the depths as well as the heights. We look forward with breathless anticipation at what awaits us here in this place.

So while that undefined thing we call normal is ever changing, my God's faithfulness is never-changing. While my understanding of truth changes, the Truth is always the same.

And this brings my heart great joy.

And because pictures are worth more than words sometimes, here is a glimpse of life lately.

Seton Lake, BC, our honeymoon location


Happy times out on our kayak, Jenny


<3


Driving through BC, some of the most beautiful country I've ever seen.


Our new city - Jeremiah 29:4-7


I live in a beautiful place.




Allergen-free corn muffins. Strangely yummy.